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Building Blocks of Confidence: Tips for Teaching Your Child Self-Assurance

Building Blocks of Confidence: Tips for Teaching Your Child Self-Assurance


As parents and caregivers, we all want our children to have a healthy sense of self-esteem and confidence. However, building self-assurance in children is not always an easy task. With the right techniques and the use of some building blocks of confidence, we can teach our children self-assurance, resilience, and determination.

Building blocks of confidence

1. Encourage independence

One of the biggest blocks when it comes to building confidence in children is dependency on adults. Encourage your child to be independent by letting them make their own decisions, encouraging them to take on self care practices, and allowing them to solve their own problems. This will instill a sense of responsibility and self-reliance in your child.

2. Praise effort not outcome

Most parents tend to praise their child for being smart, talented, or gifted. But research has shown that praising effort is a better way of building confidence in a child. Praising a child for their hard work helps them to understand that the process of achieving something is more important than the final outcome. It helps them to appreciate their own progress and worth, rather than pressure them to live up to unrealistic ideals.

3. Practice positive self-talk

Self-talk, or the language we use to talk to ourselves, plays a crucial role in building inner confidence. Encourage your child to use positive self-talk. This means replacing negative self-talk such as “I can’t do this” with positive affirmations like “I can learn this”. Helping your child to have a positive outlook on themselves and the world around them will help them to feel more confident and capable.

4. Try new things

Trying new things is a great way to boost confidence. Encourage your child to take up new challenges and not to be afraid of failure. Explain to them that failure is not an endpoint, but a stepping stone towards success. When your child sees how they can learn and grow from mistakes, they will develop a sense of resilience and determination.

5. Emphasize strengths, not weaknesses

Everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses. Emphasize your child’s strengths and how these can be used to achieve their goals. This will help your child to appreciate their own unique talents and abilities, rather than feeling inferior to others. Focusing on their strengths helps to instill a sense of identity and self-worth in your child.


Building blocks of confidence is not a one-time process. It takes patience, consistency, and time to help your child develop a sense of self-assurance. Encourage them to be independent, praise their efforts, practice positive self-talk, try new things, and focus on their strengths. With these building blocks, you can help your child to develop the confidence and resilience that they need to succeed in life.


Q1: What is self-talk?

Self-talk is the internal language or thoughts that we use to describe our experiences, feelings, and actions. Positive self-talk involves using affirming and self-encouraging language to build self-esteem and confidence.

Q2: Why is failing important for building confidence?

Failing is important for building confidence because it teaches us to learn from our mistakes and to persevere through difficulties. It helps us to understand that success is not always immediate or easy, but that we can achieve our goals with hard work, determination, and resilience.

Q3: How can I help my child build resilience?

You can help your child build resilience by allowing them to try new things, encouraging them to learn from their mistakes, and focusing on their strengths rather than their weaknesses. You can also help them to understand that failure is not the end, but a stepping stone towards success.

Q4: What are some examples of positive self-talk?

Examples of positive self-talk include saying things like “I can learn this”, “I am capable of doing this”, or “I can make it through this challenging situation”. Positive self-talk is about using language that is affirming, encouraging, and empowering.

Q5: How often should I encourage my child to try new things?

The frequency with which you encourage your child to try new things will depend on their age, interests, and personality. However, it is generally a good idea to encourage your child to try new things regularly, as this will help them to develop a sense of adventure, curiosity, and resilience.

Q6: Why is it important to focus on strengths rather than weaknesses?

Focusing on strengths rather than weaknesses is important because it helps people to appreciate their own unique talents and abilities. This can help to build self-esteem, confidence, and a sense of purpose and direction. Focusing on weaknesses can lead to feelings of inferiority, shame, and self-doubt.

Q7: How can I help my child become more independent?

You can help your child to become more independent by encouraging them to take on self-care practices, allowing them to make their own decisions, and giving them space to solve their own problems. This will help your child to build a sense of responsibility, self-reliance, and self-assurance.


Building Confidence in Children: A 5-Step Guide

Helping Your Child Develop Self-Confidence

Encouraging Kids to Use Positive Self-Talk

Four Ways to Help Your Child Embrace Failure



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